“You Can’t Make this Shit Up- Episode I”
By Jim Culp
May 13, 2022
So today, I had to go to the main VA in Kansas
City for an exam and some supplies. All good. Despite having to go to thar abhorrent
area of the city, the whole thing was painless. When I left the VA, I realized
that I had a very empty stomach, as breakfast had been over three hours ago.
As I rode into Independence (which is only
eight miles from my place in Lee’s Summit) I felt hunger pangs, and thought of
some place to eat lunch. Well, since McDonalds and other fast food places are ten
bucks a meal now, I thought I might just head to Golden Corral…or as I call it…Troll
Trough.
I chose my food, and sat down in the front
area, and immediately noticed two very familiar sights at the old TT. These was
a large crew of Hispanic guys from a road crew that had the same idea I did
about lunch. They were eating and laughing lunch away…not a care in sight.
To the right of them were two very large
Trolls. Each had it’s own trollette, and each was screaming at the young trolls
about this or that. I ignored them, and talked to my daughter on text as I ate
my meal. Once I was ready to go, I signed off with her; and made my way to the
waitress to tip her. She smiled and winked at me for the tip, because she
typically receives fifty cents or maybe a dollar from the clientele there that
are mostly in their mid hundreds.
As I turned to leave, I heard two separate
Trolls arguing, and curiosity made me look around the corner. There they were,
two large cave Trolls; each holding her trollette by the arm, and a mammoth sized
portion of pies, cakes, and ice cream stacked on a plate about a meter high.
They were throwing insults at one another, and threatening bodily harm if their
particular trollette did not get a scoop of jelly bean on its plate first.
I left before the SWAT teams arrived, not
wishing to engage. Life goes on.
-Jim
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